Monday was a shit day for me. Actually the week preceeding it was pretty awful too. Sometimes life just kicks you in the balls and seems to take a lot of pleasure out of doing it. Kudos life. Colour me soundly beaten. But the wheel never stops turning and in these moments we seek distraction. For me that usually involves a trip to the cinema or a marathon with whatever game is in the console. This time, however, a surprising conversation with my wife about her Grandfather’s obsession with Wild West gun fighter, Johnny Ringo led to a nice bit of distraction.
Aside from her Grandfather’s obsession, Kerry didn’t know anything about Johnny Ringo which put me in the rare position of being in possession of knowledge Kerry had never acquired. Quite the occasion indeed! Johnny Ringo was a leader in the notorious wild west gang, The Cowboys. He blazed a fair trail of destruction in his 32 years on the planet and was known for being extremely fast on the draw. The Cowboys are probably best known for their feud with Wyatt Earp and Doc Holliday. One would have assumed both Earp and Holliday would be more worthy of obsession, but Kerry’s Grandfather was a Ringo man and that was that!
When a discussion like this takes place, the obvious thing to do (in my house at least) is to watch a movie featuring all the characters involved. There’s no shortage of choices on this subject, the two most obvious ones being Kevin Costner’s misifre (ahem) Wyatt Earp or the superior Tombstone.
Tombstone is not a classic movie. It is, however, a rock solid piece of entertainment. Johnny Ringo is played to gloriously hammy effect by Michael Biehn. He plays Ringo as an educated phsychopath with ridiculous gun hand skills. There’s a menace to Ringo, he doesn’t seem to care if he lives or dies and does not back down from anyone. The movie mainly follows the fortunes of Wyatt, Virgil and Morgan Earp. Doc Holliday’s friendship with the Earps, particularly Wyatt is also well documented here. It is central to the story and is never anything less than adorable. Wyatt Earp is played by Kurt Russell who is on excellent form. There’s a strength to the performance that is absolutely essential to the success of the movie but there’s a pragmatism about him that makes him just that bit more relatable too. His two brothers Virgil and Morgan are ably played by Sam Elliot and Bill Paxton respectively but it is Val Kilmer’s Doc Holliday who steals the whole fucking show.
Kilmer plays Holliday as a charismatic gambler/gun fighter who, like Ringo, is highly educated and extremely fast on the draw. He also has a way with words. Who ever thought the phrase “I’m your huckleberry” would be so quotable? Those of you who have seen the movie just said that line in your head in his voice. The Holliday/Ringo scenes are absolutely rivetting. There’s just an immediate dislike among the two men with Ringo feeling like he has to prove something to himself and everyone else while Holliday is secure enough in his own abilities to make a joke out of the whole thing or straight up threaten Ringo as he sees fit… talk about confidence.
The movie rips along at a fair old pace and places heroes and villains in direct contact in several tension building scenarios. Things come to a fever pitch when the Earps and Doc Holliday square off against several key members of The Cowboys in the famous gunfight at the OK Coral. Now, you all know about this legendary fight as there have been movies, books and even songs written about it. In this movie it is used as a massive plot point. What you probably don’t know though is according to reports on the incident, the event took place pretty much how it happened in this movie. Holliday is of course the joker in the pack, taunting one of The Cowboys (a very young Thomas hayden Church) into firing first and as the bullets start flying he remains the calmest man in the fight. There is a point when one of The Cowboys seems to have Holliday’s number. Doc’s apparently out of bullets and trapped. “Now I have you” rasps the Cowboy. Holliday responds, “you’re a daisy if ya do” before shooting him in the chest with his last bullet and at the same time Morgan Earp shoots the unfortunate chap in the head. This seems like something that could only happen in the movies but, again, there are reports that Holliday had that verbal spat before he and Morgan Earp put bullets in the Cowboy. Wyatt Earp’s “get in the fight or get out of here” to hapless Cowboy Ike Clanton is also documented. The lead up to the OK Coral, the four men walking side by side (pictured above) has a quiet coolness about it. The scene itself is explosive and is a real treat for western buffs. There are, however, other less celebrated scenes that are equally entertaining in their way.
Like Wyatt Earp dealing with troublesome patron, Johnny Tyler, in a nice gambling establishment. Tyler has basically scared all the decent folk away and Earp needs to start making money. So he goes in to check out the bully. After a quick verbal exchange Earp slaps Tyler in the face, “are you gonna do something or just stand there and bleed?”, he sneers. He’s actually going easy on the guy. Then you realize that Johnny Tyler is played perfectly by Billy Bob Thornton.
Then there’s the obligatory St. Crispin’s Day Speech, except in this movie it is the actual speech delivered by Billy Zane in front of The Cowboys in the local theatre. You’re fairly certain that they’re going to kill the poor lad but, guess what? It’s Shakespear and his writing reaches everyone. The Cowboys love it and it is genuinely funny watching them cheer on a, let’s say, tender Billy Zane.
The movie ends on a fairly cheesy note which again seems like something that could only happen in the movies but turns out to be true. The scene is preceeded by more brilliance from Kilmer though so it’s all forgivable and I was left wondering what it would’ve been like to be in a room with Doc Holliday and Johnny Ringo trading insults with Wyatt fucking Earp looking on (see above pic). It’s the stuff of absolute legend… except it happened! Fact is though, even if I had a Delorean, I wouldn’t go back and check it out. I’d be too frightened. My tenderfoot ass wouldn’t last five seconds among these folk. Movies, even imperfect ones, are the best form of distraction which is why I adore them.
Cheers,
G.
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